A letter to the Minister for Local Government

Dear Mr Healey,

In your capacity as Minister with responsibility for Local Government I know that you will be keeping on top of all the exciting developments brought to the county of Somerset through our joint venture company SouthWest One. Our current customer base provides a very impressive list which is also easy to remember being a round number. As you are aware we had hoped to have been granted the status of a Unitary Authority to manage the affairs of the county better and look after the thousands of frail and needy folk within it. Instead we have been trying to urge cooperation upon the District councils who would benefit so much from joining us in seeking procurement savings. For some extraordinary reason the District councils have shown less than outright enthusiasm. I feel it is now time for them to be told a few home truths. After your recent experiences with the judges on Strictly I know you will understand. I simply hope that when you get back the red boxes of Whitehall you can kick them all into touch.

With best wishes and good luck for the next few rounds,

Jill X

Staff Training Video

Bully for Him from Alan Jones on Vimeo.

My Hero

James Bond's Doppelganger from Alan Jones on Vimeo.

The name's Jones...Alan Jones

What inspired casting! Daniel Craig plays the enigmatic and energetic agent Alan Jones as he battles with all those nasty organisational terrorists and makes the hearts of the ladies flutter with unbridled excitement. I will be there when it opens in Somerset with Maltesers and Kleenex to marvel at the portrayal of a man who has become - for all of us in this great County - a living legend.

Oh how I would love to be his Moneypenny.
SOLACE of course is his trade union.
He's actually an Advisor on their Management Board
But with so many professional stresses and harrassing challenges it is a wonder that he ever has time for any sort of extra mural activity.

Open and Honest

I cannot and will not tolerate secrecy. It is morally wrong and offends against all my principles of Liberal Democracy. So when a sad misguided member of the public accused me of bringing my "office into disrepute by handling correspondence and questions with evasiveness, dishonesty, and incompetence and also improperly" it was entirely right that such unfounded allegations should be properly investigated. Indeed they were, by no less a body that Somerset's own fine and impartial Assessment Review Sub-Committee who found (as I confidently expected) that the overwhelming majority of the allegations were entirely without basis. In the nature of such things it is equally proper that the results should be fully published. There is a small box of chocolates left over from Alan's Dream Team Challenge which will be awarded to anyone who can find the relevant publication on our excellent website or anywhere else. I must congratulate our legal locust, Merc Slobodan-Gold upon his remarkable ability to turn transparency into invisibility.

Challenge of a lifetime!

I wish we could really offer such a large prize! Nevertheless our very own Somerset County Council Dream Team Challenge will provide something much more valuable for those who participate. It will prove what I have always recognised - that the staff are eager and willing to get stuck in, to gain detailed knowledge of all the Council's many functions and to work together effectively. Come on everybody, lets make waves and prove what we're all about. It is Alan's brainchild. The Dream Team Challenge is unique to local government and certain to be very good fun. And there's a small box of chocolates for every team. In other words one cherry fondant each. Register right now!

Come all ye faithful

A chance to meet a charming man in a charming Somerset town tomorrow when Frome plays host to dear Alan. Our much-loved Chief Executive will be on hand to answer all those niggling little queries you may have about disappearing investments and triumphant joint ventures with IBM. Make a date with the man who makes all our lives such a pleasure. It is not too late to book.

This is no time to gloat

The news that my friend and trusted colleague Alan Gloak is to be reported for some small alleged transgression of the council allowance system is distressing. Alan has reacted with decorum and restraint throughout by maintaining silence about the issue. I share his sentiments entirely. Now is a time to remain quiet and allow the responsible authorities to investigate. I know that Alan will cooperate fully. He is the most decent and upstanding citizen. People forget the pressures to which such a public figure can be subjected. Those who throw the first stones should take great care. I have decided to set the record straight about the real Alan Gloak - the Alan Gloak I know and love. I will soon be recording a message that will be despatched via the telephone system to all households in the county. My party leader, Nick Clegg, wanted to do something similar but was dissuaded by the Information Commission because of the possible accusation that such unsolicited calls could be deemed an invasion of privacy.

I have taken expert legal advice from Mice, our new in-house guru of all statutes, and he assures me that my recorded message will be quite in order provided the text is published in advance. This will therefore be done without delay. Councillor Alan Gloak is not without friends. I will stand by him throughout.

Alan is saved

Thurs Sept 25th

is going to be a big

day for Cornwall.

My friends and colleagues at County Hall, Truro will gather in the Trelawny Room at half past one and announce their choice for the new Chief Executive of the new Unitary Authority which begins work next April. We have all been nibbling our finger nails nervously in case dear Alan, who - naturally - made it to the short list, should be selected. Let me be frank. It would have been a triumph for Cornwall and a disaster for Somerset. But my good friends in Cornwall have responded to my entreaties and decided that Somerset can hang on to its most excellent leader. I am delighted. You will be too. And we Liberal Democrats hold openness and honesty in great regard. So I am happy to reproduce the important items on the agenda for tomorrow's deliberations in Cornwall:

4.
Exclusion of the Press and Public
The Implementation Executive is asked to consider a resolution that the press and public be excluded from the meeting for the business specified in the following item on the grounds that there is likely to be a disclosure to the public of exempt information of the following description:

Information relating to an individual

5.
Appointment of Chief Executive of New Council

But, frankly, I cannot imagine what possible information about any individual the Cornish executive would wish to keep secret. This must be a typographical error.

Alas poor Philip

I first met him at a Liberal Democrat conference some years ago and was impressed with his energy and ideas. Even then Philip Thompson was beginning to display the vision and committment of a true believer in the cause. He is 26 now and certainly a lot wiser. Philip's decision to study American politics in Arizona was a brave career move. Only someone of his tireless ability could have contemplated combining complex study with the day-to-day responsibilities of serving the community in London's Kentish Town. Philip's move was, inevitably, controversial. The wagging fingers emerged. How, they said, could he possibly represent people from so far away? Why should he qualify for the £700 monthly councillor's allowance? These questions were cruel. I know that Philip would have managed it. Distance is no object to a young man like him. I understand. Here in Somerset distance is normal. And we are well accustomed to colleagues who may be physically with us but often behave as though they aren't altogether here at all.

MSG

I have had personal and political doubts about Mono Sodium Glutamate for a long time. There is an abundance of evidence that illustrates the dangers of excess MSG. Nick Clegg, I know, takes the issue very seriously indeed. And we Liberal Democrats have an obligation to pinpoint the risks and minimise them. That is why I intend to make a start in County Hall to reduce and - soon - remove all traces of MSG from the diets of our vital workforce and also the County's school children. To this end I have drawn up a document for discussion with the County's legal advisers. It was, thus, with some alarm that a real "live" MSG appeared out of the ether on the Somerset County Council email system. MSGould@somerset.gov.uk turns out to be the top flight legal fireman Alan has hired to fill the ample boots of our dear David Corry, who is leaving us to spend more time following ecclesiastical pursuits. Mr Gould sounds like the sort of person we need. All I need to do is get his e-mail changed.

Preparing for Government

It has been a stimulating conference in Bournemouth - a chance to meet old friends and get to grips with real ideas. I made a point of watching yesterday's important debate on Private Finance Initiatives. Arguably that is how our joint venture with IBM, South West One, might be categorised. But Liberal Democrats are pragmatic. We always accept that there is room for improvement. So the motion that was carried by conference seeks the following: "Improving independent monitoring and evaluation of public sector comparators before projects are undertaken and of outcomes when projects are under way." What a good idea. Better monitoring and evaluation must make sense for the future. Not that there was in any way anything faulty with the evaluation we carried out befotre SouthWest One was formed. Perish the thought. Another important aspect of this conference motion was to: "Ensure that public sector organisations have the necessary skills and are adequately trained to be competent buyers, ensuring that they secure the taxpayer good value for money." Another good idea. But Somerset got there first. We employed the very best Chief Executive and he did the rest.

The Final Curtain?

I have written in this column before about the prohibitive cost of parting with important staff prematurely. The nature of many severance settlements can be a severe drain upon the resources of a busy authority like ours. I would always prefer a less expensive system. But now that it is becoming a matter of record and report that our masterful Chief may be seeking fresh challenges the subject deserves some political opinion too. Let me make it clear. I want Alan to stay. I think Alan has made such a generous contribution to the future of Somerset that his untimely departure would be immensely damaging for us all. I must, however, respect the decision that he is said to have made in applying for this new role. Cornwall succeeded in its bid for Unitary status. Somerset, sadly, failed. It could have been the other way round. In which case we would have every reason to celebrate. But Alan's vision has ensured that Somerset can still put out the bunting with pride. He has excelled beyond the boundaries. And though we cannot afford the salary of £200,000 and more that this new job commands, we know that he is worth every penny. The decision will be made by the end of the month. I am torn between praying that he fails and so wanting him to succeed.

Liberal Democrats Unite

The Political Season is almost upon us. Our own Mr Bean, Nick Clegg, intends to make a considerable impact. I am already getting very excited about my visit to Bournemouth for the annual conference of our great party. It is a magnificent opportunity to get together and meet friends old and new. This will be more of a family outing with so many of my family now involved in the political process. It is also an ideal opportunity to spread the good word about the huge strides we have made in Somerset to become so positively excellent. Our partnership with other authorities and IBM - South West One - continues to generate real interest. I am sure other Liberal Democrat leaders will be anxious to join us soon. I intend to minimise my carbon footprint by travelling to the Conference in company. Perhaps you would care to join me. If so please follow this link.

Chief Executives Do Not Come Cheap

Poor Mark Bilsborough. He has had a very rough deal indeed from Swale Borough Council in Kent. I last met Mark at a conference a while ago and his fine facial features were sadly drawn. In fact he has been absent from the tiller of his council since just before Christmas two years ago. There were unsubstantiated allegations made against him by other members of staff. He was subsequently sent on gardening leave - a costly excercise for the council: they paid him £256,000 for doing precisely nothing. And then there were some other big bills for lawyers. All in all Swale Council (or rather its council tax payers) will have spent more than £400,000 getting rid of its Chief Executive. Now for that sort of money one could conclude a deal with one of the world's biggest and most succesful IT firms and hearld a brave new dawn in public services. That's what we did with over £400,000 of your money. Well actually Alan Jones did most of the hard work. And what a Trojan he is. Losing Alan at any price would be a tragedy. So let us all put aside any unsubstantiated tittle-tattle, let us disregard the mutterings of those cowardly organisational terrorists and get on with it - like Alan does.

A load of old.....

There may be nine months to go until the County casts its vote, but even a week is a long time in politics. I make no apology for reminding readers that 2009 will be a vital election year. I intend to lead my team in an adventurous campaign that will inspire people to renew their support for our efforts. I intend to prove the huge value of our policies. I will be bringing forward detailed initiatives as time goes on but my over-arching philosophy is to espouse the cause of open government. The flow of information to citizens and stakeholders has increased ten fold since the Liberal Democrats achieved power in the county. And transparent government has been a Liberal Democrat watchword since our 1997 manifesto. Everyone will know how honest and sincere we have been in recent negiotiations to achieve better quality services in the County. Sometimes there is confusion about certain elements. Voices are occasionally raised in criticism that elected representatives have been excluded from the details of such important developments as the creation of SouthWest One. Let me make it absolutely clear. Liberal Democrat Councillors must be open about all things. The Chief Executive and Senior Officers understand this deep-felt need and treat it sensitively This is why they feel it important, sometimes, to protect us from details which might otherwise prove too much of a burden for myself and my team. This is nothing more than an act of human consideration on their part. Such capable officers they are too. Trust is another of my watchwords. More about that at another time.

The Main Man

There is little more to add. This film speaks for itself. His single human fault is is also his fundamental attraction to the opposite gender. We love him.

This is important

It is stranger, they say, than fiction - and much more important. I believe that telling the truth about issues is the prime responsibility of politicians. To that end I make no apology for singling out the selfless attitude of the Director of Corporate Resources, Roger Kershaw, who has now decided to 'come clean' about his evidence to the Standards Board. This is a matter close to my heart. The Councillor against whom he was giving testimony was, at the time, a member of the Liberal Democrat group. But Roger's statements and the word of the Chief Executive led us all to believe that this man had no future with us. That Councillor has now been acquitted and Roger has decided to clear his own conscience by publishing the evidence in full. I believe it is my duty to endorse his decision and I urge fellow Lib Dems to read what he told the Standards Board